Peace October 2013

This past month has been full of loss.  Our dear sweet Janet passed away from a year long battle with breast cancer, and this morning there was news of another dear sweet sister, Donna, that passed away last night due to E. Coli and complications.  This has really got me thinking:
These ladies were only about 20 years older than me.  What if I only have 20 more years to live? Am I ready to die, will I be ready to die.  There are days where I feel like I would be ok to go, I have great things waiting for me on the other side, first and fore most my Drake.  Then there are days where I am weak spiritually, or days when I think there is no way my kids could live without me.  And they keep me going.  And I know I am here now for a million reasons. BUT, in all this time of pondering, crying and also rejoicing for these two sweet friends of mine, I have thought about my own death and my own funeral.  So here it is.  Here is what I want:
I want an open casket, public viewing.  I want others to have closure with me and see that my body is empty but they will feel my spirit so alive. I want this to take place at the church.  I want an obituary and in my obituary I want it stated HOW I died.  I hate when I have read ones in the past and they don't say how the person died.  It drives me crazy.  And I want my obituary to say: if you really know Melissa, you are rejoice with her as she has reunited with her precious son.
I want to be dressed in my temple clothes, as this is tradition for our religion.  I know dressing the body is a very sacred and spiritual experience.  I would like my mom, Debi, and Jessica to dress me in my temple clothes.  I want all of my sisters there if they choose to be and I want Carolyn, Christie, Alison and Suzanne there. Depending on the ages of my children, I want them there and if Autumn, Brinnley and/or Hadley are endowed, I would like them to dress me if they choose.  But if I die like tomorrow, then the first list applies.
I want my family to gather together for a family meeting and prayer.  Family includes my children and husband, all of my immediate family and the Bowers family.   Also included will be anyone who has flown distance to be there for my funeral. This could be and is not limited to extended family, the Gleasons, Cameron, Becky, the Payne's.  I would like my Dad to say that prayer.  I want everyone to have time to say their final goodbye and bear their testimonies if they choose.
Once my casket is closed and everyone is walking into the chapel for my funeral I want someone playing some of my favorite hymns on the organ, very softly.
Opening Hymn: I Feel my Saviors Love
Opening Prayer
Eulogy: By Debi Shumway
Favorite Memory: (short 2-3 minutes) by: Suzanne, Mary Crappa, Becky Williams, Autumn, Jaxon, and Brinnley
Song: Noel choose one and sing it (I am a Child of God? I Believe in Christ?)
Talk: Jessica Payne (just make me look good.  I'm counting on you haha)
Slideshow of pictures and pretty music (Dave Lee, or JC can you do this? Talk to the women about a song choice.)
Short Talk: Don Bowers
Song: Primary kids, cousins, grandkids, which ever applies "I Love to See the Temple"
Short Talk:Bishop
Closing Hymn:   God Be with You till we Meet again
Closing Prayer

Family and friends welcome to the graveside service immediately following the funeral.  I want Brandon to thank everyone for being there and I want him to dedicate my grave.  If Brandon and I go together and Jaxon is a Melchizedek priesthood holder, I would like him to dedicate the grave.   Family return to the church for a luncheon.  I don't care what is served for food, do whatever Brandon and the kids want.  If they want pizza, pizza it is.  If they want the ham and funeral potatoes, that's totally fine.  I want each of my kids and Brandon to take some flowers and plants home.  Don't leave all the pretty stuff at the grave!  Who ever wants flowers, let them take them! Then whatever is left over you can leave on the grave.  Make sure Mary Crappa makes cookies and cake balls!  And Suzanne, please send each of my family members home with a small loaf of friendship bread.  Debi, don't do the luncheon! Please pass that on so that you can be with my family at the grave.  After the funeral I want family and friends to go to my house (after you have changed clothes and gotten comfortable) and sit around talking, reminiscing and playing games. No more crying!  At least for today.  Oh and I don't think I want this to be on a Saturday.  Maybe a Monday or Tuesday.    
This is all subject to change :)
For now I live each day to its fullest and I count my blessings.
Sorry if you think this is the weirdest post ever!